I AM A MACHINE!

60 minutes non-stop on the spin bike this morning and I felt like I could keep going! It was just me, the bike and an hour of speed driven music.

My reward: A puddle of sweat and a sore but.

May Day is going DOWN!

Monday Weigh In Results

My third weigh in so far and by far my best week in terms of exercise and nutrition. I lost 2 pounds this week which brings my total loss to 14 pounds.

I find myself in a little bit of a confused zone. On one hand I am happy to lose the 2 lbs but on the other I am disappointed that it is not more. Based on my first 2 weeks and how hard I worked this week I was hoping for a 4 or a 5.

I was going to erase the previous paragraph because I gave myself a shake and reminded myself that my goal is 2 - 3 pounds per week so it's GOAL ACHIEVED! I decided to leave the paragraph in because>> thats what I was truthfully thinking when I wrote it. In this paragraph I decided that I should feel more positive about the week.

I really worked out hard and I had some good motivation going head to head with Clyde. I thank him for that. I wonder if 2 pounds will be enough? Definitely beatable. I haven't been to his blog yet but considering it's 6:30am I'm guessing it's too early for him and I'll have to wait until I get done work to know how my virtual challenger did.

I am reminding myself that this is a long journey and for the third week in a row I have moved closer to my desired destination. Another battle won in the war.

MM

I feel like I am doing well!

I've just had a great overall feeling lately.

Sure there has been some soreness here and there but each time I move a sore muscle there is a hint of pride with the pain. Pride that the soreness is there because I've done something to better myself, to achieve my goals.

I feel thinner and lighter. That is until I look in the mirror without a shirt on... REALITY CHECK!.... It's amazing how I have avoided mirrors in the past.

I stood and looked at myself in the mirror this morning....really looked....at all the rolls and flab and blubber. It's depressing, I guess thats why I avoided the mirrors. But I think that because I am now actually actively doing something about this problem I can stand to look at myself in the mirror. It's still painful, no doubt about that, but I am facing the problem now instead of avoiding it.

Although things don't look good in the reflection now I know they are getting better, and like the title of this post, I feel like I am doing well.

MM

Temptations

They are everywhere.

I started keeping a list of when other people offered or tempted me with something that was on the unhealthy side of the food spectrum. Well not really a list, more like a running tally. Every time it happens I tick a line on a sheet of paper. 4 lines vertically and then the 5th horizontally through the 4 lines kind of thing. For example if someone was to say: "have a cookie" (thats one mark) if when I say: "No Thanks." they answer back: "Are you sure?" or "Come on just 1" or "No you gotta try one" (that would be a 2nd mark)

I am amazed at how fast the ticks are adding up. The reason I started doing it was because me and a buddy got to talking about trying to stay on a diet over the holidays. I don't have to tell anyone here that it is really hard. Especially Christmas, there are parties and food everywhere.

Then I got to thinking about all the other times that temptation rears it's ugly head. Like birthday cake or anytime Grandma is around! She is a fabulous baker and loves to nourish her grandkids. So I wanted to know, in a year, how many times would I be tempted. To be clear it's not how many times I have a craving, the page would already be full that way. It's how many times SOMEONE ELSE tempts me.

It's not like I walk around with a pen and a sheet of paper in my pocket either. I just try to make a mental note of it when it happens and then record it later that night at home. It's been kind of fun to the point of hoping that people will actually try to tempt me. I've already decided not to give in to temptations but when it happens now my first thought is: "One more tick for the sheet!"

An interesting experiment I guess. I have to keep the sheet a secret, except to the blogging universe, so that I don't influence anyone to act differently. I have faced temptation 5 times in the 7 days since I've been recording them and all 5 times I've held strong.

Ups and Downs

In less than 3 weeks I've already experienced so many ups and downs.

I was supposed to exercise this morning but stayed in bed for an extra hour instead. I was bummed out all day because of it. When I got home this afternoon I had a kick ass workout! 20 minutes of weights and 40 minutes on the bike. My shirt was soaked and that bummed out feeling was traded in for a feeling of contention and pride.

If I can keep those "up" feelings outnumbering those "down" feeling I am sure that I will be okay.

MM

5 yr old girl crushes 315 pound man

I was over at a friends place today and I was talking with his daughter who is only 5 and very smart. Seriously, the kid was full on reading books at three. She is five now and instead of reading she puts her finger down and scans through a page in about 5-7 seconds. Even her dad, who is a brain himself, did not believe she was actually reading the books that quickly but when he tests her on the contents of what she just read it is obvious that she is reading and retaining information.

Anyways, the kid loves to read, and I mean LOVES to read. Which is kind of troubling because she might read something not suitable for a five year old. Like the time she got her hands on a high school biology book and then explained to me how babies are made in full graphic detail. Or when she read a book titled "True Ghost Stories" and then was scared to be alone.

A lot of the time when I speak with little 5 year old Jenny it would feel like an adult conversation except for the super tiny voice. Her vocabulary is amazing.

So today we were talking about me trying to lose weight, and healthy foods, muscles, fat and exercise in general. That's when she said "I think you would be categorized as obese Marcus." Wow did that sting. I think if she had said "fat" instead of obese it wouldn't of cut so deep.

Jenny wasn't trying to be mean. She was just using her little scientist brain. For her poltergeists can be dangerous, a penis ejaculates semen and Marcus is obese. Just the facts. And that is how a little 5 year old girl with glasses crushed a 315 pound man today.

Being that today was a planned day off did not help. Tomorrow, however, is a planned day on. While I'm riding that bike tomorrow morning I'm going to think of all the big fancy words Jenny can use to "categorize" me once I've lost this weight.

Week 2 Weigh in Results

Another good week! I lost 4lbs this week taking me down to 315 with a total weight loss of 12lbs !

I'm so tired right now and my legs feel sore. I think I've over did it the last 2 days so I'm going to bed early and I think tomorrow will be an exercise free day.

MM

In the Dark at 5am...

Thats what time I have to set my alarm clock to get some exercise in before work. This morning when it when it went off I thought to myself: " Ugghhh... grumble, grumble..." I crawled out of bed and across the room to shut it off. I have to put my alarm clock out of arms reach on the opposite side of the room or else I'll shut it off and stay in bed.

Standing there in my room at 5am looking out the window at the darkness I had a real urge to just reset the alarm clock for 6am, cancel the workout and jump back into my warm bed. That is not what I ended up doing. I got on with the day and did what I had planned to do.

The first 5 minutes of my bike ride were slow and I was probably half asleep but slowly, as the blood started pumping and those little beads of sweat started to appear on my forehead, I felt better and better. When it was all said and done I had put in a solid 30 minute bike ride and added a few abdominal crunches to the end of the workout.

Driving to work at 7am after a workout , a healthy breakfast and with some healthy packed meals for the day felt really good. Plus I felt like I had a little jump in my step and some noticeable mental clarity throughout the workday. A noticeable difference from getting up at the last possible minute and then rushing through a McDonalds drive thru for breakfast on the way to work.

I'm so glad that I resisted that urge for the extra hour of sleep. That is one battle won for me in this war on obesity. Now I am eagerly anticipating a good Sunday and hopefully a rewarding Monday weigh in!

Bike! Bike! Bike!

When I first started riding my bike I could only handle 5 minutes before my but and legs would make me stop. Today I rode for 30 minutes and felt good about it. My but still gets sore but it's getting easier and the folded up towel on the seat helps too.

Diet has been good too. Eating a small, healthy meal every 2 to 3 hours has kept me from feeling hungry which helps a lot. There has been a couple of times where I have had to make myself eat just because it was time to eat. It's a strange sensation to go almost 2 weeks now and never really be hungry or full. I still do get cravings for certain things but that's different then being famished and then overeating which has been the norm or me.

So I've been jumping around reading different peoples blogs and I realize that my blog needs some work. There are some nice looking blogs out there. Some pictures would be a good start to making this thing look a little more interesting but that will have to wait for another day. I need to get some sleep so I can get up in time to have a bike ride before I go into work.

Double M

1st weigh in results!

So my weigh in was on Monday and it's taking me till Friday to post. I don't know why I waited so long because I had a good result. Drum roll... I lost 8 pounds this week! YAY!

I've been so focused on working out and eating right that I've let the blog slide because of time and just being exhausted. But I've decided that I have to keep the blog going and update it frequently. I don't think anyone is reading it but I like that it keeps me accountable and I could just treat it as a diary that is open to the world.

I'm throwing the towel in....

Actually I'm throwing the towel "ON", as in a folded up towel on my bike seat. So far it works a little. It lets me endure a little more time on the bike. I've stayed on as long as 15 minutes! My legs feel super wobbly when I get off.

Really anxiously awaiting my first weigh in on Monday. Going to try to do my best over the weekend.

Peace.

Back in the Saddle....

By saddle I mean bike seat which I am finding very uncomfortable. I've got a pretty big but for such a small seat. You would think that all that extra fat back there would act like a cushion. Someone told me that it will take some time to get used to the seat and eventually it won't bother me. Here's hoping thats true.


I'm finding that the nutrition side has been going well. Better than the exercise side has been going, I thought that the opposite would be the case.

After a couple days on the path to health I am finding that I am very tired and am falling asleep the second my head hits the pillow. Not a bad thing I guess, sleep is good. Better than the usual tossing and turning or watching TV or playing video games in bed.

My first workout

I purchased a very nice spin bike in January of 2009, the best my money could buy at the time. It's a Schwinn Evolution - SR. I was following up on a new years resolution to exercise and lose weight. 14 months later the bike is still in brand new condition unused.... unless you count acting as a clothes hanger.

So with my new found resolve I dusted the bike off, got my water bottle ready and a towel for all the sweating I was going to do in my first workout.

I lasted 5 minutes. In that time my forehead got a little damp and I never touched the water. My thighs were burning, even as I type now almost an hour later they are both yelling at me. Man am I ever out of shape.

Thinking positively, thats five minutes more biking than I did in the last 14 months. Maybe tomorrow I can do 6 minutes?

Fed up.... all the way to 327 pounds.

Hello to whomever chooses to read this blog.

Well, here I go with my very first blog entry. I decided to create this blog as a way to help motivate myself to finally lose the weight.

I am 36 years old and have been overweight my entire life. I was 160 pounds at the age of 11. I remember this because in gym class we all had to, one by one, get up in front of the class and weigh in. It was just so that we could be divided into weight classes for the next couple of weeks for wrestling. I was embarrassed. God that was 25years ago... Is this really where I'm going to start this blog? Yes, I guess it is.

I always new I was bigger than my friends, that was obvious. I just did not realize how much bigger I was until that day. I can remember one of my friends coming up behind me, putting his head on my shoulder and looking down he said: "Marcus can still see his feet!" It's amazing how you remember these stupid little moments. I guess it was good that I could "still see my feet" but it was probably bad that my buddy had to check.

Okay enough with the past lets get on with the present. That is partly what this blog is all about. To move forward, to be accountable for each day and to ultimately be as healthy and happy as I can be.

Today I weighed in at 327 pounds at a height of 5'10..... after I wrote that I just stared at it for a minute. How did I get here, how did I get all the way to 327? Well I know how and so does everybody else, I eat too much and do not exercise... duh. Pizza, chicken wings, nachos, chocolate, I love it all and in mass quantities.

So I have a plan to lose this weight that starts the second I submit this first blog entry. No more saying I'm going to do it only not to start at all, no more quitting after a few days, I'm talking commitment here folks. I know it's not going to be easy but I have to change, the alternative is unacceptable. I like that word right now, UNACCEPTABLE! I will not accept anything other than success.

Here is my Plan:

• Eat 5 to 6 smaller meals a day.
• Exercise every other day before work
• Get plenty of sleep and rest
• No junk food, no fast food
• Cook my own healthy meals

Well thats a basic look at my plan, a good start I'd say.

I guess I should define some goals:

• To lose 2 - 3 pounds per week
• Ultimate goal is to lose 120 pounds (that would make me 207 pounds)
  

Okay. This is getting a little long winded for a first blog. Hopefully this will ultimately keep me accountable and inspired, I need the help. I will keep this blog brutally honest. First let me be clear "Marcus" is a pseudonym, I guess 25 years later I am still embarrassed to let people know how much I weigh.